I took my time approaching this column topic because I wanted to get all the submitted quotes and perspectives in an accurate fashion without misconstruing. Whether it has been at conferences, supermarkets or business meetings, men of all backgrounds have approached me about writing this topic. Ladies, please be advised that whilst I do not recognize these traits, (I ride on the feminist train all day every day, lol!), the gentlemen seemed adamant that these are traits they have encountered and would want to avoid at all costs.
Proverbs 21:19 states, “it is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman. “If asked how one’s day has been, apparently we women do not need to state every negative aspect of our day. Complaining also does not garner the level of pity points we believe they do with men. One man lamented that whenever he asked a lady about her day, she always focused on the negative. Debbie Downers come across as pessimistic and will complain endlessly.
Doting fathers have been blamed for this type of woman. When some fathers obsessively dote on little girls, they face the risk of creating very entitled women. As a result, these women apparently believe that they are God’s gift to all men and they expect men to make them feel the same way their dads made them feel – like princesses. Such women have unreasonably high expectations and more than likely will never be content and fail to see the difference between compromising and settling. What a good woman sees as a reasonable compromise for the sake of her relationship, they see as “below them” and “dropping their standards”.
Solution-oriented, Single Sally
“These women always got de answers but ALWAYS single.” They text girlfriends when they see a silhouette of another woman in the front seat of a man’s car; will readily point out the flaws in a boyfriend; and have an opinion although it is never requested.
“If, and this is a BIG IF, a man decides he ain’t busy and takes this chick for a spin, he soon realizes that she is emotionally immature; believes she knows exactly how a relationship should be; is stubborn and never apologizes.”
“I like to feel as though there is something to chase or a little fight in the game. When a woman is too clingy or overly submissive, there is no real zest. I work hard so I cannot message a woman all during the day. When it is hot outside and you ask me to sleep over by you with no fan, I do not want to cuddle. I am a big man, not 16, so don’t expect a teddy bear. This is not something to fret about.”
Ok bruh! Tell us how you really feel!
Another brother stated that a common trait amongst Clingy Chloe’s is that they can NEVER be alone and will never take the time out of being in a relationship to assess themselves.
Cur-Ray-Zee (said like this)
Includes all women who boast about being petty. This includes women who arbitrarily state how exactly they will castrate a man, flatten his tyres, cut up his clothes, the list goes on. Whilst a man may not want a clingy woman, he certainly does not want a crazy one. Behaving badly does not win points being perceived as “so in love”. These women thrive on drama and love pushing buttons in a twisted way to prove to themselves that the man will put up with their nonsense because “he loves me”. In reality, this just builds resentment and Miss Zee is eventually ghosted.
Insta Thot Tammy
No man I spoke to had much to say about women who throw their vaginas in all directions. Nonetheless, two close friends did state that they avoid committing to Insta thots. They admitted to sliding into the direct messages of a few and “riskin” but also admitted that these women are not the third choice to be taken home to meet mother dearest.
“They usually try to distinguish themselves from the ‘pack’ by saying that they can’t get along with other women because they’re mostly catty, gossipy and aggressive. They admittedly prefer having male friends. Most of the time, they embody the same qualities they project on other women. They’re just trying to make themselves seem special or different. A deeper look reveals that they have low self-esteem. Some guys might fall for them because they think they’re different. Whatever different is.”
Gold Digging Dolly
I recently listened to TD Jakes tell the women in his congregation that on behalf of all affluent men, he wants all gold digging, “broke” women to know that affluent men do not want them. He reinforced it by loudly declaring, “we don’t want you!”
One gentleman stated that he refuses to date a woman who doesn’t have a career. Another seemed to express a certain level of disgust at the fact that women want equal rights and still want the man to pick up the tab on every occasion.
One man made it clear that although he would have sexual relations with most good-looking women, he was not willing to commit to any woman who was not bringing certain elements to a relationship.
“Also, we are usually onto the tricks of gold diggers and put up with it based on if we can afford to and how attracted we are to the woman. We are never fooled.”
As a woman, I’d like to point out that every woman who has a rich man is not a gold digger. Perhaps the gold digger reveals herself when hard times hit or will jump ship when the money is looking slight.
I suspect this came from a very bitter place but I promised to be transparent. Apparently, there is a difference between a “child’s mother”, “a co-parent” and a “chile mudda”. According to him, men must be very careful who they procreate with *sideeye*. Chile muddas are women who cannot separate their issues with the father of their child and the relationship the man ought to have with his child. As a result, I am told, “chile muddas” will seek to “poison children against their fathers; come up with excuses for the child to not be seen by the father; demand that the father not bring any of his (insert derogatory female term here) around her child (even if the man is not involved with anyone.)”
I have been further advised that women with these characteristics will, more than likely, never find a fruitful relationship because they focus so much on hurting the fathers of their children rather than accepting it didn’t work out and forming a pleasant relationship with “another good man”.
Fellas, I hope y’all happy now.
Toni Thorne is a founder and entrepreneur who enjoys a great debate, family time, island life and minding her mouth! Email: [email protected]