#BTEditorial – We are better than this trio of shame

At a time when most of Barbados is reasonably fixated on the rising COVID-19 death toll and new infections attributed to the highly infectious Delta variant, three troubling events have surfaced that should not be dismissed.

At the weekend, a disturbing video went viral of a woman gripping the neck of an infant while suggesting that she was forced to do so.

In the video, the female declared: “You coulda care ‘bout she? This is what you father do. This is what you father do.  I ain’t give a [expletive] … who you show this to. This is when you push people to the point of no returning.”

Quick action by police has led to a woman being taken into custody to assist with investigations into the matter.

We hope the matter is dealt with fairly and decisively. The abuse of an innocent child is abhorrent and must not be excused, covered up or dismissed.  No doubt families and households across the country are facing untold pressure of all kinds and on so many levels but the protection of our children is non-negotiable.

We shudder to think how many other children suffer in silence as they face similar or even worse circumstances not made public by a viral video.

No one – mother, father, grandparent, aunt or caregiver – should believe that they can with impunity ill-treat children.  And when we stand idly by in silence, pretending it is not our business, we aid and abet a sick cycle of abuse be it physical, emotional, sexual or verbal. As a society, we are duty-bound to confront and stamp out the abuse of our children regardless of the form it takes.

So, if you see something, say something.

The second incident involves a troubling report also made public by a viral social media video of two women who were attacked on a beach.

Laura Tam reported that she and her friend Chelsea Simmons were at Pebbles Beach when they were repeatedly approached by an unknown man mumbling and talking despite their repeated requests to be left alone.

The man nevertheless kept approaching the girls and despite help from a few people on the beach, he eventually punched Tam in the chest.

Tam reported the assault but said that one of the police officers told her “could see why” the man was harassing them.

Tam, who has since formally reported the incident, expressed concern about how the matter was handled, noting that women often leave incidents unreported because of how they are treated.

The incident triggered angry reactions from commenters and reignited the debate about harassment.

Unfortunately, it remains a vexing issue that is often dismissed as perception and much ado about nothing.

Far from it, harassment is a serious matter. It begins with unwelcomed and inappropriate remarks or physical advances but it often doesn’t end without leaving a scar on the victim, being psychological or physical.

Too often in our society the problem is ignored because the most common form, men harassing women, is dismissed as just a part of male behaviour.

It often goes unreported because victims who formally complain end up being further harassed by being made to feel as if they are not telling the truth, and worse, that they somehow encouraged or deserved the treatment meted out by the perpetrator.

Women or men or girls or boys shouldn’t have to watch over their shoulders and walk in groups of two or more in fear that somebody will assault them. We all want to be treated equally, to be heard and accepted no matter who we are. Therefore, we have to call it as it is: harassment is downright wrong and shameful.  And those charged with the responsibility to address such matters must be properly trained to provide support and guidance for victims, not shame and blame.

Last but not least in our trio of shame is a story of pointless greed and theft.

Crooks attempted to make way with the free carts and bins the Government has handed out in its bid to improve garbage collection and introduce home recycling.

But technology backfired on the crooks, leading to the recovery of the stolen freebies, the Sanitation Service Authority’s Carl Alff Padmore revealed.

Shameful to say the least is stealing garbage cans when all Barbadians are expected to receive one free of charge.

So, is this who we are? These are anecdotes, to be sure. But they appear emblematic of wider issues in our society – child abuse, sexual harassment and theft of public resources. Let neither pandemic nor hurricane, volcanic ash nor economic troubles be excuses for the intolerable and indefensible.

If we are indeed to build back better in the wake of calamities, recent or current, and if we are to set a new course for our destiny as a sovereign republic, then we must work to re-educate and agitate but not violate. For these three stories have a grounding in a culture and value system that is at once alien and all too familiar. In order for the way some Bajans act to change, all Bajans will have to change their thoughts.

Be it abuse, harassment or stealing, Barbados is better than this.