#BTColumn – The answer is to question

‘A student struggling to read is not sent home and expected to return reading fluently, so why is it that a student struggling to behave is sent home and expected to return behaving decently?’

School administrators and teachers deal with students daily, whose behaviour may range from aggressive and anti-social to disruptive or disengaged. Teachers come to school to teach and often find their efforts are failing when a student’s negative behaviour disrupts learning for a whole class.

Take a child who may be highly reactive, distracted or impulsive. They are encircled by several others who are affected. The student may not know how to self-regulate or may simply be unable to do so. When controlling the behaviour is taking up too much teaching time, the student is sent to an administrator. The same goes for a student who bullies others with words or actions; this becomes an administrator’s problem because the teacher has little time to solve it.

There are students who come to school every day who need more than teaching. Their behaviours are a cry for help; always within a context. Learning and behaviour will come from relationships and interactions with others because emotions underlie behaviours. All behaviours, whether conscious or unconscious, are always for a reason.

Imagine three concentric circles. The outer circle is the wider context – the factors that impact behaviours at school are often beyond the school’s domain: the dynamic and situational particularities of the FAMILY culture, the student’s extended community and its practices impact the student’s relationship with learning and behaviour.

The immediate environment of the CLASSROOM is vital in supporting POSITIVE behaviours and at its core are the students’ relationships with the teacher, supporting their emotional and learning needs. Key factors are the ethos and management of the classroom environment, how the physical space is used, structure and routine. Most important is the language used when speaking to students; particularly those who find self-regulation difficult.

When I have a student who is disrupting the learning of others, I ask them to step outside with me for a moment. In privacy, this conversation ensues, “Tell me what I need to do to help you? I know that you are finding X difficult and I want to help because I care about YOU and I care about your LEARNING.” ‘X’ may be the task, managing a relationship with another student, or just paying attention. You’d be surprised at the responses.

Given the opportunity, I have been told many things over the years: I’ve had no breakfast, Tommy called me an idiot at recess, no one likes me, my granny died yesterday, I found out I am adopted, my mother is having another baby, I’m good at nothing, I need a break more often, I don’t know what I am supposed to do, I have no bus fare to get home.

Reasons I would never know if I did not care enough to ask. Once the reason is clear, the solution can be found; the student has safely got it ‘off their chest’ and no longer feels alone in the burden they are carrying.

In the inner circle is the triangle of student-teacher-task. Once the immediate environment is clearly understood, the interplay between effective learning, appropriate teaching and behaviour is more likely to be productive and positive.

Most schools have a Guidance Counsellor but the ratio of this key player to the number of students is far too high to meet the emotional needs of all students.

Let’s face it – we all have emotional issues we bring with us to school. While teachers can talk to trusted colleagues, students often do not trust anyone enough to voice what is causing them pain. Unless there is a relationship that has been invested in and nurtured by an adult who is compassionately solution driven, the behaviour of the student escalates until it is so dire that the easiest response is suspension.

The hardest is for someone to take personal time to delve deeper (and this is in short supply for teachers). If I could prescribe one thing, it would be for every school to have an Educational Psychologist. They have insight and therapeutic skills at their disposal and strategies for meaningful intervention. They lead the team that TOGETHER affects a change of negative behaviours. More vitally, they have the background with which to train coworkers to manage the link between the three circles, thereby creating an improved dynamic.

No child is born ‘naughty’ or a bully. Circumstances develop habits, both positive and negative. ‘Bad behaviour’ is a cry for help. Always. We need to catch the pain children are experiencing and act quickly or the result is a dysfunctional adult. A closer relationship between parents and school is essential.

We simply must become better at this and all key players who can affect change in a child who is crying out for help, must collaborate. Once in a while, there comes a child who life will have to teach the lesson to; but 99 per cent of the time behavioural issues can be positively impacted when we make the time to ask the question.

Julia Hanschell can be contacted at smartstudying@gmail.com